As I sat on the roof tonight gazing out at the mountains of Haiti I felt at peace. Earlier before the roof I was filled with fear and anxiety, feelings that do not come from our Savior. One of my best friends is here in Haiti with me and she suggested that we go on the roof. I almost declined the offer then something inside told me go. As we arrived and sat there on the roof gazing at the stars an overwhelming feeling came over me, and it was not the sunburn I had gotten earlier that day. To give some explanation on why I was feeling these things is I have been struggling with what God has in store for my future and also things that have been going on here in Haiti. I felt so anxious that I could have thrown up and only one thing could rest these feelings. As my friend and I sat and listened to praise and worship music looking over Haiti is when I started to feel that overwhelming feeling. I felt the need to fall to my knees and weep. As I rocked back in forth in prayer God began to ease my fears and anxieties. I cried out to Jesus to help me with my struggles and to give me strength and peace to trust in Him and His will for me. When praying an image came to mind. The image of Christ being whipped, lashed, and beaten. And that through all of his suffering he thought of me. He thought of me on this roof top crying out his name in need of his peace and love that before my new life I could have never felt without Him. My pain has no comparison to the pain he was inflicted so that I may be restored and cry out his name in times of desperation. At that moment He eased my spirit and I was able to sing out praises and worship Him for my life and the fact that he is living all around and in me. I know that I will have struggles and bumps in my road but I do know that I will always have a Savior to come running too to catch me when I fall, to heal me when I am weak, and to lift me when I am low. I am so thankful that He is always there and that I have such a powerful God, and that whenever I feel weary I can just fall to my knees.
I Know Where To Fall
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.